I HATE MY ROOMMATES!!!

It is not always that I set out just to talk about other people but this week, a freshman’s remark about his roommates dug up old memories which before now I had thought were buried deep down in the abyss of my overcrowded memory. Memories whose existence I had grown oblivious to. Memories of gentle John (our loyal doormat), memories of dirty Jide, memories of talking Timothy, memories of my 100 level days, those few months I spent in the same room with three (until now), total strangers.

I couldn’t just stop the picture of Jide from crawling into my conscious mind the moment that freshman remarked:

“I don’t know how to handle Tolu my roommate, the guy is too dirty!”

Unlike every person unfortunate to have encountered him, I never really considered Jide a dirty boy per say. I considered him a special person, one that needed to be understood. Jide could go a week without touching water and you would barely notice, all thanks to his loyal Nivea body spray.

If Jide’s corner ever had the slightest similarity of cleanliness or orderliness, we had cause to suspect he had a date or was expecting a very important guess, perhaps his mom. If his plates were ever washed, then perhaps gentle John, our amiable doormat had become too uncomfortable with the smell from the fungus producing plates. Jide was very good at keeping things safe, especially in places he would later not remember. Or better put, places he would forget to look should in case he needed those things. His alarm was the weakest in the whole of A62. While it would jolt everyone to military alertness at first ring, it was just too weak to tickle his ears even when it was ringing from under his ears. Jide… (I could go on about Jide but he was not the only roommate I had in my first year).

Let’s talk about talking Timothy. As his name suggests, he’s a talkative, a debater per excellence. You couldn’t match his argumentative energy even if you were on a diet that is based solely on Carbohydrates and Red Bull. He could argue about relevant, non-relevant and obscure issues alike. Even the most ridiculous of subjects were topics of debate for Timothy. When I first met him, I thought his life was dependent on his talkativeness as he seemed to draw energy from his constantly busy tongue. You can never win an argument against him, not necessarily because his points would be more cogent but because you will concede out of frustration and weariness.

Unlike Timothy, John my other roommate was very quiet. He was our gentle doormat. He had a tough skin for taking everybody’s nonsense. While Timothy would rant endlessly about Jide’s lousiness or claim rights to space with everyone in the room, John would sit quietly in his corner listening to Don Moen or Nicole C. Mulen. John was very terrible at conflict and confrontations. Whenever he had no choice but to confront Jide about how he messed up his soap or how his loud music was disturbing his brain, he would end up stuttering with his voice sounding like a scratched CD struggling very hard to play its contents…

My first year roommates, as ‘special’ as they were, were the best I have had yet. And despite the fact that it was hard at first putting up with their different characters and cohabiting with Jide and Timothy, I am grateful I met them.

They all helped me to become a better person in ways I couldn’t have imagined. For example, because of Jide’s ‘expertize at keeping his stuffs’ I learnt to look out for my neighbor. Whenever he was in hysteria looking for a Chinos trouser that was staring straight at him, I always was the one who would point it to him. I sometimes took it upon myself to put his things in order even if most times it was all in an effort to avoid the disturbance that comes from his search for his stuff.

Talking Timothy helped to shape my perception on things, because of him, I learnt to look at issues from a holistic point of view. I never took a stand on an issue until I knew I could defend that stand. Because of him, I learnt to question every proposition, every statement, and every claim.

Gentle John taught me that there was more to life than just a continuous struggle over supremacy with my roommates. I learnt to take out time from my busy schedule to do some reflective thinking and do a review my every actions. From John, I learnt to be patient and always stay calm especially when things were not going my way. 

Your first year roommates are a gift to you and are the best you’ll ever have! So, instead of complaining always about them, you should find a way of living harmoniously with them. They are the ones whose memory would forever stick to your head.

By: Gift Uzor (Prof Gee)